Open your eyes and stretch your hands This house is clean, but it is not my home Did I make this bed? Did two hands touch on too? Sometimes I think of someplace colder The sound of traffic and the way it’s warm When you feel yourself grow up inside of you And you love me just like a stranger But you love me just like I am Remember we ran through ugly streets We made our rules and then we broke them first It felt like we were running all the time But I wouldn’t give one ugly moment I’d wrap it up, I’d keep it in my sock I can keep it, yeah, I know what’s yours is mine And you love me, just like a stranger But you love me when I Slip into the sleep that lets me love some other day We get bored of weakness all the time I wont know how much I’ve lost until I’ve gone away Your sun sets when my sun starts to shine

Listen to the sounds that are ringing all around you These are the cries of the dying breed Politics of hate you never get around to Blood over brains that we never need I saw you in the back, studied and relaxed Fixed in the pose like a silent stone Serenity intact, it’s the feeling that I lack Life in the floors of a stable home I can trace you in people like the sketch of a smell You’re a breath to the runner in context Close to the nerve but you rest so far away And I have to give it up someday Every time I close my eyes, I see you in front of me Pretending in a love like this I have no choice but to put you in back of me Don’t cover my footsteps Dead weight alright I know you’re no good for me Dead weight alright I know you’re no richeous leader Dead weight alright, that’s fine but get your hands off me You’ve got to touch me with kid gloves You’ve have to touch me with kid gloves Body to the wind, you taught me how to stand still I never felt so alive at once Finger to the quick, yes I can feel your hands still Pressed to the dream of the coming months Cheer me up, cheer me up, I’m a miserable fuck Cheer me up, cheer me up, I’m a tireless bore Cheer me up, cheer me up, I’m invisibly stuck inside myself Yeah, I’m a vanity whore Because it’s race and it’s power at the center of life We are blind to the people who needs us But you’re the kind of person who could understand that fault And I hope to measure you someday When you compromise yourself like that, it’s a dedication So real and unflinching

I will be the one to let this roof cave in on me Buried in this house, this wooden graveyard by the sea We push away our families to understand our needs The love and all the hate I used to hold in front of me Restless nights, all dizzy spells all sand between my sheets Showing signs of thirst I tried out boardwalk blistered feet And now I know I never knew about you only me We carried this inside like some disease we couldn’t beat We could wait and try to live and get by To make our family in a second floor apartment Standing on the threshold, body out in fresh cold Go ahead and celebrate the things you lost Try to breathe to flex our wings To cry out work out what the underrated part meant Moments are a lifetime Nothing in a straight line This could take a little while to shake things off Down by the water’s edge, under the dying tree I let my body slip, something outside of me But when I came around, some kind of murky face I don’t ever wanna be alone like this I will tuck into you like I always ought to be Shadows just a shade of light not darkness in degree It was you who knew me first this wasn’t meant for kids like me some brutal natural force we only feel we never see But as you took the tide your brother beside the heads got smaller till they vanished into silence sinking into white foam running to a new home we can only understand the things we see We cease, desist, and see it like this the eyes wide open in the beauty of the bright lights standing on the threshold, body hot and flesh cold I don’t ever want to be alone like this I have no choice but to be vicious on my feet I never sleep I never eat I am learning how to be lost completely I want to be found, we crave the things we push away These patterns cut like every day I need you to reach I need you to need me Down by the water’s edge, under the dying tree I let my body slip, something outside of me But when I came around, some kind of murky face Shaking my bones, put me back in my place I don’t ever want to be alone like this Haunted by the presence of the things I miss I am becoming the ghost of myself trapped little secrets, little things we never tell

Steven I love you I can’t grow past you I’m homesick in spite of the place That I’ve fostered and styled to raise this child Who keeps me in pitch and in pace But I’m just reaching for the lasers The sound of the beat as it clicks away Classless, cool behavior Sweating the night out of the sky Learning to laugh and not ask why Steven I missed you the whole world kissed you You shot up in bloom like a fern That was spotted and black with the leaves roll back Is that same trick too easy to turn Should I change my name and move to the country A life full of children and animals White fences, landed gentry Maybe I want to be myself But I am somebody else Nine months later I’m the lonely one With all the fruit of labor And half of the fun Chris & Cosey in the rising sun He’s got the heart of gold, man it beats like a drum And it shakes, the pebbles that crack in the brain, the kid logic dissolves and it all starts to give away That nothing is ever the same I can’t stand it I want to be myself But I am somebody else Steven I’m watching the world get boring There’s too much restraint in the mix I’d be overly flattered to feel so shattered To have something broken to fix But I know the world outside is knocking The dream and the drive with the pedigree The forces interlocking Maybe I want to be myself But I am somebody else And you’ll never harbor someone like me If you never leave then you’ll never see I swear that I will pull you from the wreckage Of this Sunday Monday routine I will pull you from the wreckage Don’t you leave me on my own ‘cos you and me, we’re two of a kind steven I love you and I can’t grow past you I have nothing left to give to you

I had a lust I had a firecracker I had a love for the sound of this world I’m still in love It’s just a stab at laughter It’s just a mark of the people we are But don’t be daft It’s just a monkey business There are no signs, no reminders of sense We deal in abstract No pain and no deliverance This is a punch I’m not punching up against Oh it’s all just mirrors Laugh and smoke we are living in some tiny joke And I’m here to show my lust ambition Dedication to Kick the wall, Smash the lights, Rip the shades, Burn it all firecracker, firecracker I will not complain at all, but I will never be tricked by you I never thought that I would be this ugly I never thought I’d be biting my hand That feeds the mouth, that spits the seeds of money I’m just a shell I’m a sensitive man We make a choice to unfold a tiny secret Put it in lights for the grunt of this place Is it the same thing to write it as to think it? I’m chopping noses just to ruin my face Break down on the record company Oh, did you turn your back on me Or did I turn myself against myself Kick the wall, smash the lights Rip the shades, burn it all Firecracker, firecracker I will not complain at all, but I will never be tricked by you I’m still in love I set the love in motion I’m still in love with the future we planned Tell me you feel The same complete emotion I’m still in love with you, baby I am Did you turn your back on me Or did I turn myself against myself

I wanna, I wanna drown you in a pool of blood I wanna fix you like a hawk I never had guts, no thanks, I’m a velvet touch Soft money, soft looks, soft , oh till you stop Untangle your wings and fly to the sheltered sky No money, no poise, no bullets and shame Cold water rush inside me like a seeping dye, Clear color in place of what it became All this fight, now, We lock and release I thought you’d always be my brother in conflict Drums beat, it’s just the sun and the beast I thought you’d always be my brother in conflict now Shake body, shake fingers, shake fist, shake a lot of things Shaking myself all over the floor Such really great moves I had, no I thought I’d sing My voice raw, wrecked, and ragged before I turned my back on beauty, it’s a man made crime Most are, most will, we’ll do it again Blood money, blood money it’s a man made rhyme Conquest, complex, compete till the end I don’t see, I don’t see, I don’t see anything Take the car, take the cash, take the heat out of me Every day, every day losing my sympathy I don’t see all this… I don’t see why we took an axe and thrust it into sunshine Under the glow I lost you for the first time And when it cleared I hit you with a fast line Why do you suffocate both of us now? We break a lot of trust over the wrong things The freedom of my speech and I’m just talking When will I learn how to chew these words? I have teeth I have teeth I have teeth I have to lose my idols to find my voice Lose my idols to find my voice.

Those seven months I spent rolling around on the floor Just like a crippled bird I had my back to the door Still I turned my nose up at the water and bread Despite my greater love I was protected and fed But I am here, I am here, in the center of myself And do you still think about me? Yes, I am here waging battle with this version of myself I right my wrongs, and think how things used to be, yes I do Some kind of violent spring I have to cover my eyes Water chokes on land, spitting up on the sky Rain down in paragraph form Too late and I don’t know why I put my legacy first, oh what a reason to die All the hours past, the body pressed to the wall Hear you breathe in, breathe out, sometimes nothing at all Can you still hear me now? There’s no labor too small, to Labor under you, it’s just response to a call A celebration coming up, I see the rising of dawn Oh, the sun in the scratch of the mirror starts to blind me Coming up fast, when did it start to go wrong? I keep a picture of you on the mantle to remind me Of a time when life used to be so easy, so easy, and so small I wanna dance something caustic and real, these days We’d trade the earth for the things that we feel Check you halves, never choosing to heal This time, a law is smashed, I know you like breaking laws Something you’ve felt, something you’ve seen We are embodied in between, but when you’re lost in your eyes When you are selfish and mean You are the ugliest person I have ever seen, and I hate you I hate you, I really do

Late summer sky, two colors deep, three wide and a third I’ll buy And set to try to take away the shadows from your eyes You shift and sigh, we were fully grown when we learned to cry This is why, I never hold a grudge against you, love. But hey, this is the future And we don’t grow up like that We grow teeth and we grow nails And we scratch to the bottom of meaning One body bends, one body twists and breaks and a lifetime ends We rush to mend the situation, but it happens all the time I could pretend to think fondly of the summer I spent in the wilderness Playing soccer and kissing girls And we learn to be ashamed of each other And we learn to be ashamed of ourselves One busy street, one flock of birds which scatters beneath my feet These simple things, they stick to me like truth, like ice, like fire

Every day our picture frame’s falling down Landscapes all tossed around In cities that start to drown But when I start to push the fear out of me Come steady my shaking knees And drag the roots out to sea And it’s hard to be steeped in your gaze You’re always drinking me I have no place to be awkward and silent Spoil your tongue with my silence My flavor ripens inside this There is no love without trying There is no easy way when I Crane my neck to kiss your head, I know That the something that I can rely on And when I strain my thumbs to push this thread I sew There’s some kind of future That I can be sure of Oh I’m just breathing in, contracts on everything Reluctant and measuring The food that we choose to bring But I can trace an invisible piece of string Connects between you and me Like symbols of property Oh, and I recognize Come from a cloth, always solid and breathing And you and I retract like swans always advancing , receding Belief in something worth eating, shared love is something like feeding There is no trust with needing And I wonder why there is no choice in the things that we hear We hear our lives inside these sounds, there’s nothing good on the radio There’s never anything good on, There’s never anything good on There’s nothing good on the radio There’s never anything, so I stop to sing And these things come rushing from behind Life is changing so fast And there’s nothing I can do to stop it Chorus Because I love you…

Love, spread out like seeds Somebody walked away From landscape poverty I came to find you I came to see the beauty underway The bloom locked energy And it turns around like you And it turns around like me Into something new But the only thing I see I see you Always struggling To find some gentle song Some mode of simple trust And ways to understand These reaching orchards Of broken faith Grown deep inside of us By force of troubled hand I see you Always struggling To find the sun Reaching down through shadow brush Breaking up the bitter branch Twisted roots like tales Dreams of all spot-lit kids Drinking up the light Like California redwood moons Splitting up the night And it turns around like you And it turns around like me All the talking we could do Oh, if only we could be A real live version of you And I real live version of me I see you Always struggling

Lonely boy, where do we go? I’m stuck believing on the other side Stuck on my own Run fast retreating for a place to hide Safety in things I’m dumb for thinking Because a piece of plastic Is nothing more than a piece of plastic Empty streets under my feet How did we get so far from the general beat Of hearts that cling, held fast together In the dying day, oh, you are swimming inside the magic hour And when you wet your skin You could soak up all you need to know Picture me, how will you picture me when I am dead? Fast and free building up fantasy blocks in my head My legacy do these things dissipate in the years unread I felt a pain just like a knife, and then the Time, it left me, oh I’m just trying to do my best I’m not afraid of life I’m afraid of death Build my love in the things I say You gotta lift your face to the breaking day So I ran and I jumped and I flew till I came into the center of the earth, so cold. And the wind picked me up, took me straight into the belly of the fears I hold And I ran And I came right back Threw my arms around you You were dressed in black I’m so glad I found you Before you burned my stuff Objects all around you Do we outlast things, Memories, and sound, or do we Fade like this Beat the body down into The ground, the flesh and the soil That we love so much I always wanted to return Return to the body where I was born I always wanted to return Because the time it leaves you It leaves you like blood, red blood